If you’re thinking of trying out your skills as a sugar baby, you’re probably wondering how to land your perfect partner and start living the high life.
In this article, we’re going to cut right to the chase so that you don’t waste any time creating the sugaring lifestyle you deserve!
Understanding the Sugar Baby Lifestyle
One thing that many new sugar babies learn quickly is that there are many different styles of relationships to pursue in this community! So, in order to start looking for the right sugar daddy and be able to state your preferences and boundaries, your first step will be to think about what kind of relationship appeals to you, such as:
- Traditional SD/SB relationship. This umbrella term applies to sugar relationships in which a sugar daddy offers gifts, support, and experiences to a sugar baby. The sugar baby’s responsibility is to provide companionship and emotional support to make his or her daddy feel cared for and valued.
- Platonic SD/SB relationship. A platonic sugar relationship is one based on companionship without physical intimacy. This type of relationship may lean more heavily on emotional support, travel companionship, mentorship, or being a plus-one for a sugar daddy who attends many social events.
- Travel companion relationship. A sugar daddy who travels often for work or pleasure may want a partner who will come along for the ride! If you like to travel and can take care of yourself while your sugar daddy is busy in meetings, this is a great relationship style for you.
- Long-distance sugar relationship. If your lifestyle is too busy for a consistent in-person sugar relationship, a long-distance one might be a good option. It will allow you to build a relationship with a sugar daddy from afar and plan in-person dates only when they’re in town or willing to fly you out to their city.
- Virtual sugar relationship. Many sugar babies these days are keeping their relationships entirely online. This will open you up to meeting sugar daddies all over the world—as long as you can deal with the time zone differences! A virtual relationship can have all of the elements of a traditional SD/SB relationship, only without the in-person meet-ups.
Setting Clear Expectations
Once you know what kind of sugar relationship will be best for your personality and lifestyle, it will be time to get clear about your boundaries. For instance, here are a few things you’ll want to share with any potential partner:
- The type of relationship you’re looking for.
- Your current availability.
- What you’re looking to gain from the relationship.
- Any important things you think a sugar daddy should know about you.
Not sure what this would look like in real life? Take a look at the following example of what you might say to a potential sugar daddy after some polite introductions:
“You definitely sound like someone I would like to meet! Before we set something up, I do want to clarify some things about myself. I’m a student with a part-time job so I am looking for a sugar daddy who is okay with meeting every two weeks or so, preferably on weekends. I would even be available for weekend getaways every once in a while! I love trying new restaurants and going on active dates like hiking or kayaking. I should let you know that I am not one for big crowds or lots of social interaction, so I wouldn’t be interested in being a plus-one at work events. But, if you’re looking for some quality one-on-one time, I’m your gal!”
“I can’t wait to learn more about you! We should absolutely set up a video call soon so that we can see each other ‘face-to-face!’ Before we take things to the next step, though, I want to share a few things about me! I am interested in virtual sugar relationships, only. That includes phone calls, texts, videos, you name it. I’m available for texting pretty much all day, and can schedule calls after work most nights and on the weekends. I’m a great listener and an even better flirt! So, if you’re looking for a spicy special someone, we can talk more about the details.”
Safety First
Staying safe as a sugar baby is your top priority and this goes for both online interactions and in-person meet-ups. Let’s talk about strategies for keeping you safe:
Online Safety
Just like with any online space, you can’t be too trusting of people you meet on the internet. Here are a few ways to stay safe while getting to know potential partners online:
- Use only reputable sugaring websites. Make sure to stick with websites that have identity verification, a good reputation, and a system in place to flag suspicious accounts.
- Don’t share any personal information too soon. Everything from your real name to your social media handles to your living address should all be kept under wraps for now. Over time, as you build trust with a sugar daddy, you can consider which information to share, but start out as much of a closed book as you can be.
- Take note of suspicious communications. If you’re interacting with someone who has an inconsistent or odd way of having a conversation, consider it a red flag. You should also be wary of emotional manipulation like pressure tactics to try to get your bank information or send money.
If you do get caught up in an online scam, don’t beat yourself up! Report the incident and move forward with a little bit more caution.
In-Person Safety
Meeting up in person will require a different set of strategies for safety, including:
- Choosing the right location. You want something in public, during the day, and preferably in an area you know well. That way, you’ll feel more confident and be able to get yourself home if needed.
- Keeping a loved one in the know. Whether it’s a friend, roommate, or family member, someone should know where you are and expect timely updates from you. They should also know what to do in the case that you don’t respond.
- Learning to tune into your gut instinct. You should never feel guilty about leaving a date that doesn’t feel right. If you’re uneasy and anxious—more than just first-date jitters—make up an excuse to leave.
Building a Strong Profile
One of the fastest ways to start lining up dates with potential sugar daddies is to make your profile irresistible. And some of the ways to do that might surprise you!
- Take clear, inviting profile pictures. Even though you might have an idea of successful sugar babies taking the sexiest pictures, the truth is, that a genuine smile is more likely to make someone click on your picture! That’s not to say that you can’t throw in a few flirty pics, but your profile should be open, authentic, and not overly sexual.
- Put time and care into your bio. Don’t make the mistake of assuming that sugar daddy isn’t going to read your bio! In fact, this is an important way for you to make a good first impression, weed out potential partners who aren’t looking for the same kind of sugar relationship, and entice the right match to send a message. You want this part of your profile to be positive, bubbly, and true to your voice and personality. Although you do want to mention the kind of relationship you’re looking for, make sure to focus more on what you’re willing to bring to the table!
- Use key phrases that will attract your perfect match. Key phrases are useful for sugaring platforms that use filters to match potential partners. But they’re also useful in clarifying what you’re looking for in the sugaring community! So, make sure to pepper in relevant phrases or keywords such as “travel,” “virtual,” “non-monogamous” or whatever characteristics interest you.
Maintaining Boundaries
Learning to maintain strong boundaries is a skill that will serve you well in sugaring and other areas of your life! Take a look at some tips for setting and maintaining boundaries:
- Be specific with your boundaries. It may feel a bit nit-picky at first, but trust us, the more specific you can be about your boundaries the better. For instance, instead of telling your sugar daddy, “I’m usually busy in the evenings” you can say something like, “I will not be available for calls, texts, or dates after 9 pm.” This sets up a crystal clear boundary that won’t lead to confusion later on.
- Make sure that you perfectly understand your sugar daddy’s boundaries. Boundaries are a two-way street and your relationship will be better off when you both have the space to discuss your desires and non-negotiables. Remember, if you want sugar daddies to respect your boundaries, you also have to understand and respect theirs.
- Know when to bend and when to hold firm. Life is not black and white, which means that sometimes you will be flexible with your boundaries, and other times, you’ll need to hold firm. For instance, if your sugar daddy needs to reschedule a date last minute, you can be understanding. But, if it happens consistently, it will be time to say something.
Enhancing Personal Development
Many sugar babies are pleasantly surprised at the life skills they learn from their experiences in this community! For instance, some of the most common ways to grow as a person while sugaring include:
- Better communication skills
- Juggling multiple responsibilities
- Negotiation
- Confidence-building
- Self-advocacy
Being a good sugar baby means knowing and believing in your worth, being able to properly communicate your needs, and standing up for yourself if necessary. It’s also about learning how to enjoy the present moment, stay open to new experiences, and accept the gifts and compliments that your sugar daddy provides!
Developing New Skills
Developing certain skills within sugaring does take some effort, and you have to be open to learning and growing in order to reap the personal benefits of being a sugar baby. Here are a few areas that you’ll want to focus on for success in your relationship and in your personal growth:
- Networking. If you play your cards right, being connected to a sugar daddy can open many doors for you. So, don’t shy away from these opportunities, even if you’re a bit introverted. Instead, if your sugar daddy invites you to an event, get comfortable introducing yourself, asking questions, and letting your personality take you places!
- Social skills. Getting to know sugar daddies of different ages, backgrounds, and cultures will require you to put your social skills to good use. If you don’t consider yourself a social butterfly, that’s okay. Use this opportunity to come out of your shell so that you can become a more confident, social person in your sugar relationships and beyond.
- Time management and professionalism. Many new sugar babies are surprised at the high standards that many sugar daddies expect. After all, many of them are high-powered business people who want a partner who is on time, communicative, and open to feedback. These skills will carry over into other areas of your life, so lean into them, fully!
Dealing with Criticism
Becoming a sugar baby can have so many positive effects on your life. But, it is important to keep in mind that not everyone will understand or approve of your dating style. And, if you allow yourself to be affected by the opinions of others, it could negatively impact your sugaring relationships and self-esteem outside of sugaring. Here are a few ways to deal with the criticism:
- Build a strong sense of self. When your self-confidence is high, the opinions of others won’t be strong enough to tear you down. So, whether you find self-love through your support network, therapy, art, exercise, or something else, focus on having a good relationship with yourself, first.
- Remind yourself of why you are pursuing a sugar relationship. There’s a reason you came to the world of sugaring, so keep that in your mind, always!
- Ask yourself where the criticisms are really coming from. Sometimes people judge because they’re jealous. They see a beautiful, confident person building an alternative lifestyle that works for them and that makes them feel inferior. Other times, people judge because they grew up in a very strict generation and they can’t envision a different way to be. Understanding where people’s criticisms come from—without excusing their bad behavior—can be liberating for you.
- Be selective in who gets to be in your inner circle. Your inner circle will support you while you go through the ups and downs of sugaring. They won’t judge your lifestyle but rather make sure that you’re safe and being fairly compensated for your time and effort. These are the people who get the privilege of emotional closeness with you. Others don’t need to know the details of your life.
Conclusion
Even though we’ve shared a lot of information about how to become a sugar baby, you’ll find that it might just come to you easier than you expected! At the end of the day, a sugar relationship is a relationship, requiring some effort to find your partner, get the ball rolling, and make sure that you both are happy in each other’s company.
As long as you can take care of yourself by maintaining healthy boundaries, focusing on your own self-growth, and protecting yourself from potential criticism, you’ll do great! Now get out there and try it for yourself!
